Bosan betul hidup macam ni

Jangan salah faham. Aku bukan tak tahu bersyukur. Aku bersyukur dengan rezeki yg Allah pinjamkan. Aku tahu aku tak layak untuk semua ni. Kadang-kadang aku terfikir untuk tinggalkan semua ni dan lari jauh-jauh. Jauh sangat. Biar tak ada siapa dapat cari aku. Tapi aku ada tanggungjawab. Aku perlu bertanggungjawab pada hidup seorang gadis muda. Yang hidupnya baru bermula. Aku tak harap dia secekal aku. Aku harap dia tak perlu jadi aku. Sebab bila die secekal aku, hatinya akan jadi batu. Keras. Dingin. Aku tak harap dia begitu.

Aku bosan dengan rutin hidup aku. Kadang-kadang aku rasa bodohnya aku. Aku ada apa yang aku impikan. Masa kecik-kecik dulu aku mau gaji 3ribu. Padaku itu da cukup besar. Sekarang pada usia 24 tahun, gajiku 3ribu. Tapi aku masih lagi termangu-mangu. Bosan betul hidup aku.

Dulu aku kerja teruk-teruk. Sentiasa tak ada masa. Untuk buat apa-apa. Badan asyik penat. Mulut asyik merungut. Kerja. Kerja. Kerja. Sekarang kerja aku macam tak guna. Pergi dan balik saja. Tapi masih lagi aku merungut. Sebab tak tau nak buat apa. Pelik betul aku.

Dulu aku mau punya seorang lelaki yang akan setia bersama aku sampai bila-bila. Yang akan terima aku seadanya. Yang akan teman aku macam orang gila. Sekarang aku dah ada. 7 tahun. Dia gila bersama-sama aku. Tapi aku masih rasa bosan. Bodohnya aku.

Apa lagi agaknya yang aku mau?
Manusia memang takkan puas dengan dunia.

Hati....

Andai aku tak ada suatu hari nanti...
Jangan persoalkan kenapa aku pergi
Jangan persoalkan kenapa aku lemah
Jangan persoalkan kenapa aku berubah

Bila suatu saat nanti aku jauh
Aku harap kau sedari
Pengorbanan dan pengertian yang aku beri

Aku ada disini
Menanti, menunggu dan mencintaimu
Apakah kau hargai aku?
Apakah kau cintai aku?

Aku gadis yang lemah
Aku gadis yang biasa
Aku bukan dewi
Aku punya hati

Maafkan aku andai suatu hari aku berhenti mencintaimu..
Mungkin bukan hari ini
Mungkin juga bukan esok
Tapi maafkan aku..


(Rimas - The Fabulous Catz)

Keluhan hatiku tak siapa yang tahu
Ku simpan semua sebak di dada
Biar ku yang terluka
Pernahkah kau mengerti
Caraku memujukmu
Pernahkah kau hargai
Caraku mencintaimu

Lafazan kata dari bibir
Adakah ia dari hati
Mungkin kau tak fahami
Maksud yang tesembunyi
Titisan airmata dari pipi ke bumi
Pernahkah kau peduli betapa sedih diriku ini

Another weekend...

I love this outfit...Too bad FMIL & FSIL can't agree on which one we should choose. End up we have to choose another outfit. Huhu...Should we wear white (again) for bertandang??

Thank you boo-boo...for being a kind, understanding & sweetest fiance I've ever had (not that i had another fiance, of course. Hehe). I really look forward to our future together. But the future really concerns me. Even where we'll live after we're married is still a blur..Haishhh!!! I don't really mind where we'll live as long as I'm with you. Hihi... (gatal!)

High School All Over Again...

Taken from here. (Source : Life With Baby Donut)

Why Blogging Can Feel Like High School

Lately I’ve read several posts on various blogs about the difficulty of blogging and gaining followers.  These writers lament the fact that they have been blogging for X amount of time and only have a few followers to show for it.  And I see this same sentiment expressed by bloggers who have 50 followers, as well as those who have 500 followers.  We all want the same thing:  To be noticed, to be appreciated, to be LOVED, dammit!

And we all want to be the most popular kid around.That’s why blogging is analogous to the feelings we had in high school.

We want to be the kid with the designer clothes

I know we all look at everyone else’s blogs and wonder how they got that fabulous look.  We start comparing our own blog and suddenly it feels like ours is yesterday’s designers discount.  We want the trendy and expensive $200 jeans, not the $30 knock-off we picked up at TJMaxx.  We try designing our own or hiring a fancy graphic artist, but there is always someone more trendy than us.

We want to be the cheerleader that all the football players want to date

You know, you want to be the “It” girl—the blog to which everyone flocks.  The blog that everyone talks about with oohs and aahs.  We want to be admired and be the blog that makes people say, “What’s she got that I don’t?”

We want to be the Homecoming Queen

Just look at your local TV listing to see what award is being handed out this week.  We’re surrounded by award shows.  Every year we watch the Oscars, the Emmys, the Super Bowl.  Someone, somewhere is being crowned with some type of recognition.  Just once (or maybe twice!), we want to be handed the prize while everyone else claps for us.  

We want to be voted Best All-Around

We’ve seen the blogs that do it all:  the moms who take fabulous pictures, make amazing meals, grow their own food, thresh their own grain.  They have 8 kids, all of whom are clean and take naps.  Their houses look like they belong in a home decorating magazine.  Not only do they do it all, but they do it all spectacularly well.  We also want to be the ones who can do it all and make it look easy—all in front of an online audience, of course!

We want to hang with the cool kids

Oh what we wouldn’t give to be on the “Blogs I Love” list of some of the biggest bloggers.  How awesome would it be to rub shoulders with them and be their BFF?  We want to go to their cool pool parties and eat at their table in the cafeteria.  Being acknowledged by them somehow makes it feel like we’ve arrived, that we belong.

So why do we do this blogging thing?  Why put ourselves out there and then feel disappointed when our blogs don't get the attention we feel they deserve?  I have my own perspective on this which I'll share later, but first, tell me yours.  Why are we doing this?

LDR - Long Distance Relationship

I hate our LDR. Why? Because I always miss him. And he's always working. Day & nite. Its not easy, these LDR. We managed to go through 5 years together & 2 years apart. These LDR is killing me!

I love him. And I trust him. I have my faith in him. But I'm just human. I do feel lonely when he's not around. I do feel jealous seeing other couple. I do wonder if he's thinking of me when I'm thinking of him... And the saddest part is he doesn't even mind that we're apart.

I'm just human. And I'm weak.... =(

My wedding gown

Weddings, a photo by malyn_mizzunderstood on Flickr.

I find idea & sketch this for about 30mins. theheheeeeeee.... ;)

Its us!!!

Well...its mainly me (malyn a.k.a amalina). This is our personal blog. Where we'll share everything that happens in our love and life. It not a continuation from my previous blog : My Journey Through Everything Nice but it is merely parallel to what happens in that blog.

We (or actually me) decided to open this blog so that we can scribbled everything (and i really mean, EVERYTHING). My previous blog will focus more on our journey towards our wedding (and its preparation) but this blog will record everything that happens in between and after that!

Well.... JUST ENJOY! =)